Singles Parties – What’s Hot, What’s Not

What’s Hot, What’s Not


There’s a big difference between how the world perceives singles and the reality of who single people really are.

“Hot Chick” a paper mache sculpture by Steven Hansen.
At a recent SingularCity party, a man came to the entrance and told the doorman that he wanted to talk to me. He needed to find out something before buying a ticket.“Are there hot women here?” he asked me, peering into the room, wanting to make sure he didn’t waste his money, despite the free cocktails, abundant appetizers and room full of attractive, smart singulars talking, laughing and having a great time.

I found his question particularly confounding because I’d been to one of his parties a few months earlier. If “hot women” meant women like those, then my answer would be, “Absolutely not!”

Don’t get me wrong. There were plenty of good-looking men and women at our party. But judging from what I saw at his party, hot is long, platinum-blond hair, a few too many “dances” with the plastic surgeon, a tight mini dress that just barely covers the crotch, enormous boobs with no bra, all tottering on 6-inch stilettos in a roomful of guys circling like wolves. If that’s what he hoped to find at a SingularCity event, he’d be disappointed for sure.I can’t really blame him, though. Many singles events are meant for one thing only — to hook up. If that’s what you’re looking for, please, be my guest. I just hate the way it reinforces the mythology that singles are shallow people with only one thing on their mind. Do you think I’m exaggerating? Facebook automatically declines advertising containing the word singles. I’m serious. They’re protecting you from those naughty single people!

While the majority of singles events deserve the reputation, the majority of single people do not. One of my biggest challenges is convincing people that SingularCity is different from the same-old same-old. What we are is a diverse group of people who have decided to enjoy life regardless of our relationship status. We come in different colors, shapes, ages, with different backgrounds and varying degrees of physical beauty ― but we share one commonality: we live in a neurotic culture that tries to convince us that we’ll never be complete unless we’re married.

Well, singulars are refusing to buy into that old idea. We’ve made a choice to lead happy, successful and amazing lives regardless of our relationship status. We have careers, we travel, we’re involved in our communities and have a growing circle of friends. We’re free to pursue our dreams and free to realize our full potential because we’ve come to realize that our value is not contingent on whether or not we have a date on Saturday night. Our romantic relationships may come and go, but we remain intact and whole.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is what I call hot.

Copyright © Kim Calvert/2011 Singular Communications, LLC.

Kim CalvertKim Calvert is the editor of Singular magazine and the founder of the SingularCity social networking community. An outspoken champion of people who are living their lives as a “me” instead of a “we,” Kim oversees the creative direction and editorial content of the magazine and online social networking community. She secures contributors and is responsible for maintaining the fun, upbeat, inspirational and often-humorous tone of Singular, a lifestyle guide for successful single living.

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