We’ve got the finalists in our Love on the Rocks contest!

Finalists in Our Love on the Rocks Contest!

Check out these “worst date” stories and feel free to influence Singular magazine’s editorial team as they try to decide who should win a dream date to RockSugar Pan Asian Kitchen in Century City.

We’ve got the finalists in our Love on the Rocks contest!

During the month of September, we asked you send in your single, worst date story in 300 words or less. We got some doozies! Below are the top-five finalists submitted by SingularCity members. Our editorial staff will pick the grand prize winner who will then receive a dinner-date package worth $300 (appetizers, entrees, dessert and a bottle of champagne) at the exotic and beautiful RockSugar Pan Asian Kitchen in Century City’s Westfield Mall. Please use the comment section to express your opinion and help us select the winner! Then check out the home page next Monday to see who won the prize!

Julie Spira, screen name: pianobaby
Julie Spira
screen name: pianobaby

One day I received an email from a 61-year old woman in my inbox. Although she was attractive, my online dating profile was clear that I was a woman looking for a man. Out of curiosity, I read her email only to find out she was actually playing matchmaker for her never married son. She opened her message by saying, “You‘re darling! You might think it’s odd, but my son is reluctant to search for someone online.” She added, “You’re a perfect match for my son.”

Since I already passed the mother-in-law test, I told her to have him contact me directly. He claimed to be a 43-year old investment banker and told me he really looked like he was in his 30s. He said he was tired of the dating scene and lived in the Beverly Hills “area.” I was concerned that he’d never been married before, but as I passed my BlackBerry around and showed my girlfriends his photos, he received a group vote of approval.

I secretly wondered if his mother would be our chaperone or if we were going on a double date. Something about him seemed strange. I had the feeling there was more to the story of this unmarried Beverly Hills-area guy. I decided to type his personal e-mail address in Google and wasn’t prepared for what followed. It appeared that this eligible bachelor had recently placed a personal ad in a casual encounters/swingers group stating: Man Seeking Woman Tantra Partner in LA. There he was—the same single guy whose mother wanted to find him a wife, advertising to be an expert in G-Spot massage! I don’t know if his mother participated as well, but I cancelled the date. Sometimes it’s a good idea to follow your intuition.

Carl Paradise, screen name: Mach1
Carl Paradise
screen name: Mach1

Attractive, blue eyes, petite with an easy smile, we meet for breakfast at a trendy restaurant, the plan is to attend a MOCA event later that morning. As we eat, she constantly looks over my shoulder, I ask if she knows the people behind me. “No I don’t, but those people are jealous of us!” I turned around slowly and notice a couple minding their own business, I change the topic.

We’re at MOCA waiting in line for the will call teller. My date in a rather loud voice says, “This short man in front of us has a Napoleon complex.” He turns around with an unmistakable disagreeable look on his face, an ugly and loud altercation develops. I act as a referee trying to keep these two from tearing each other to pieces.

As we are drive back from MOCA on highway 10, we approach highway 405, she announces that she needs to go to the post office, but not any post office, it has to be the LAX office. That’s about a 20 miles round trip diversion for me… but I agree. As I’m waiting in my car in the Post Office parking lot, time seems to stand still. After about 30 minutes, I make my way into the PO to find my date chit chatting with an employee behind the counter, both drinking coffee.

Kathy Sarreal, screen name: lovespell
Kathy Sarreal
screen name: lovespell

A budding producer asked me out to a special evening exhibit at LACMA with another couple. We met when he came in for a pitch meeting with my boss. Everyone I worked with was excited for me about the date, as we all knew he came from money (which would finance his future projects) and he was easy on the eyes.

On our way to the other couple’s house, he was friendly but reserved. He asked me about my job and then the lion’s share of the rest of the conversation was about my assistant, Kathleen. My name is Kathy. I’m Asian and Kathleen was the quintessential natural beauty from Boulder, Colorado.

When we arrived at the other couple’s house, he went to the kitchen with his friends and left me alone in the living room which I thought was strange. In fact, I felt a strange vibe when I was introduced to the other couple. I immediately heard laughter coming from kitchen. Given the conversation in the car, it dawned on me that he meant to ask Kathleen out. When they all came back to the living room, it became clear to me that I was the brunt of the joke. Mortified, I told the group I couldn’t make it to the exhibit and asked my so-called date to drive me to my car. On the way back, he confessed he made a mistake by mixing up the names and tried to convince me to go to the exhibit but I could not overcome the embarrassment from being ridiculed and being the WRONG date.

John March, screen name: zenguitarguy
John March
screen name: zenguitarguy

First date. I meet a lovely, intelligent, attractive woman, we agree to go out and share a vegan meal on the steps of a church in downtown LA. I drive her home and we park outside her apartment and share a long sweet kiss goodnight. After 20 minutes or so, a young gentleman knocks on my window, hand under t-shirt, asking for a light for a non-existent cigarette, becomes more insistent, tells me to roll down my window. I refuse. Drive away.

Fifteen minutes later returning so she can go to her apartment, the young man is waiting and comes running at us with a gun drawn. I take off again and we call police. Turns out he is a member of a very violent gang, she has to move out that night as the police advise her to do so. A long and very strange evening.

The next day she tells me, “That sort of thing happens to me all the time!”

I say, “Thanks for letting me know.”

Ahhh, dating in L.A.

Pat Lieske, screen name LAPat
Pat Lieske
screen name LAPat

His cologne arrived a good ten seconds before him. A moment later, my glass filled with ice water inexplicably exploded, landing in my lap and seeping, thanks to a non-absorbent leather chair, all down my thighs and posterior. He busied himself wiping the one drop that landed on his chair, while I took care of my person, my chair, and the surrounding floor. I thought the whole thing was kind of funny, and just rolled with it. Conversely, he gave me the single raised eyebrow like I was a total freak whose sole purpose it was to embarrass him.

Since it did not occur to him that someone might be hungry at 7 pm, I went to the counter and ordered and paid for a sandwich. I guess a coffee date just meant coffee. Two minutes later, his parole officer called. Can’t say I saw that coming… He brushed it off as just some “white collar” stuff. Unabashed, he kept telling me how much he was feelin’ me, and couldn’t understand why I seemed to be holding back.

He asked me what my ideal male would be. I said, at that point, my cat. Now he too knows what ice water feels like! Next.

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