In a never ending quest to define who we are, one author says we come in a dozen categories – which one are you?
Some girls obsess over marriage, some don’t. What is it about single women that people (scientists, authors, ourselves) feel the need to analyze? There are millions of books on the single life and dating, thousands of studies on what makes us aliens singles tick, and now, apparently we can be packaged up and fit into one of 12 categories. Gee, I feel so special.
Author Michele Cove penned a book titled Seeking Happily Ever After: Navigating the Ups and Downs of Being Single Without Losing Your Mind (and Finding Lasting Love Along the Way) — gah what a mouthful — in which she interviewed 100 women, and then broke us single gals into 12 categories.
The Soul-Mate Seeker: Someone who is doing everything she can to find The One.
The Phoenix: A woman who recently had a painful breakup and is doing everything she can to rise from the ashes in better shape.
The Organic: She prefers to leave things up to destiny and live her own life rather than hunting for men in any methodical or calculated way.
The Princess-in-Waiting: She is waiting to be rescued by a prince (who sure is taking his royal time).
The Late Bloomer: The rest of her life is on hold while she waits for her future husband to appear.
The Free Spirit: She worries that she can only have one or the other — her independence or a committed relationship. (And she thinks the former is better.)
The Wedding Wisher: She suddenly finds herself fantasizing about marriage after a lifetime of not caring about it.
The Town Rebel: She no longer aspires to live the cookie-cutter lifestyle of everyone else in her community, though she once used to.
The Ritual Re-inventor: A woman who wants to get hitched but also feels very strongly about having an unconventional marriage (right down to the wedding ceremony).
The Someday-Mom: She would like to have babies someday, but wishes she didn’t feel so much biological pressure to figure it out fast.
The Slow and Steady: A woman who hopes to marry when the time is right. Meanwhile, she does her best not to cave to the massive pressure she feels from friends, family, and society.
The Trailblazer: A woman who knows married life is not for her, so she’s trying to break a new kind of path to happiness.
No offense to Michele Cove, but I think many of us are a hybrid of two, three, or more of these. Speaking for myself, I’m a dash of Soul-Mate Seeker, formerly Town Rebel (which led me to where I am today … single), a sprinkle of Slow & Steady, and a lot of the Someday-Mom.
If you’re a single girl, what type (or types) of single are you?