Hey single ladies, with Father’s Day on the way, it’s a good time to let more than one man in your life feel like a superhero, if only for a day.
By the power vested in me, I hereby declare National Appreciate a Man Day.
Now, I know I don’t have the power to make this happen, but if I could, I would. Why? Because it’s such an easy thing to do, and packs such positive power for the planet. All you have to do is say something like, “I really appreciate your help moving these heavy boxes! I don’t know how I could have gotten this done without your help.”
Ouch! I just heard a collective shriek from many women out there. “Kim! What next? First you say we’re supposed to be happy being single, and now you’re telling us to pander to men?”
Well, as far as the “being single” part goes, what I want is for both men and women to live their lives to the fullest, regardless of their relationship status. Stop crying the blues and deferring the enjoyment of life until the day you might become un-single. As for the second part, it’s not pandering to men — it’s just taking a moment to acknowledge them.
Consider it a social experiment. Let’s take 30 seconds out of our busy day to tell at least one man in our lives ― be it our father, brother, boyfriend, co-worker, neighbor or store clerk ― that we appreciate him. Hint: It works best if your appreciation notes a masculine trait, not how sweet he looks in the new rose-colored shirt his mother gave him for his birthday. Look for those manly qualities, things like his courage, his strength, his leadership ability, his perseverance, his desire to do something to make our lives easier — heck, even his biceps.
No, I didn’t find this tip in Cosmo, and since I grew up in the post female-vs.-male “burn-your-bra” era where men were seen as the oppressors, the idea to appreciate men wasn’t included in my “How to Be a Successful Woman” guide. Nor did I observe it in my own home growing up. Looking back, I can see how much my father suffered from rarely receiving a single word of appreciation from my mother.
In today’s world, men have to compete with us at work. They think we don’t need them anymore to provide for or take care of us. Some of us don’t even want a man around to father our children. We tout our self-sufficiency but when men sit on the sidelines unsure of what we expect from them, we bash them for not being assertive and manly! There’s no longer a standard for correct male etiquette. Some women expect him to open the door for them; others scoff at him if he tries.
Modern culture tells us that what men most want from women is sex — period. Well, I think men can get sex from a woman much easier than he can get her admiration, approval or appreciation. If given the choice, I think many men would take the latter (well, unless it’s Beyonce offering the sex). A man can give himself an orgasm, but as for sincere appreciation of his masculine energy? That has to come from us.
That’s why I’m advocating National Appreciate a Man Day. You’ll find it’s like putting Miracle-Gro on your relationships ― romantic or platonic ― and it’s a great way to get in touch with the magic of our own feminine energy. Let one man in your life feel like a superhero, if only for a moment. Try it and you’ll see what happens. Let’s spread a little appreciation to the men in the world and let them know that although male-female relationships have changed, we do enjoy sharing the planet with them.
Copyright © Kim Calvert/2013 Singular Communications, LLC.